Top 1: Christmas Day Rituals

On Christmas morning, everyone would still wake up early despite having stayed up late during Christmas Eve. We all had to be at the 10:00 am Christmas Mass at Espiritu Santo Church. About 40 of us... and 1 bathroom... you do the math!

Kinda crazy, huh? But it was definitely fun! All the girls would put on their Christmas dresses, and the boys would be in their slacks and dress shirts. As my Dad would put it, "Paskung-Pasko!" Heehee!

One year, I was probably 8 at the time, we all got dressed and the girls were comparing our dresses, noticing that we all had pink in our outfits - except for Denise. So Ging and Denise got into this argument: "This dot is pink!" "No it's not!" "Yes it is!" It went on and on until all the girls were on it, too! And it's just hilarious now that I think about how petty that fight was... but it turned out to be quite a dramatic - and traumatic - Christmas morning, which included walkouts, hurt feelings, and cold "Peace be with you" exchanges. Ugh!

But that was probably one of those times when I first realized that families are NOT perfect at all. We all have those moments of weaknesses (we definitely should have acted and reacted differently), but we get past those through forgiveness and letting go. At the end of the day, you just realize that you love each other and the petty differences don't really matter.

Anyway, as you can imagine, my brother, my sister, and I would almost always feel like staying at our grandparents' house in Santa Cruz to be with our cousins. And since it was our Christmas vacation from school, there was no reason why we shouldn't stay and have fun until school starts again, right? Except for one: the opening of our presents at our home in Las Pinas! (Later on, my mom revealed that it was her tactic to get us to want to go home. Otherwise, she would miss us terribly if we had to stay for vacation at Lolo and Lola's house. Wise move!)

We would ask our aunts about having our cousins to come to our home and stay with us for the entire Christmas break. Usually, we had Ging over. She would help us open our presents, go with us to our godparents' houses in Casimiro Village ("Namamasko po!"), and have sago't gulaman at this karinderia on Benfran Loop when we're done with our Christmas rounds.

(Sigh) I miss Ging. I miss my cousins in the Philippines. I miss our Christmas Day rituals. I miss Christmas in the Philippines, period.

But blogging all about it made the process of letting go so much easier. I've been holding onto these memories in my heart for so long that it seemed like I refused to define Christmas any other way. No one can put a price tag on my childhood memories of Christmas - that's for sure! I will always look back on them fondly. In fact, I've used some of them to incorporate into the Christmas memories that I am now creating for my family, my children.

But now, I am simply contented in finally moving forward - with warm memories intact and God-willing, many more bright Christmases ahead!

Top 2: Noche Buena

The countdown...

Merry Christmas Polka...

Happy Birthday, Jesus...

Read all about the Christmas Noche Buena - the Vidal Clan way - recently featured at Audrey's Mommy Corner.

Merry Christmas and GOD bless us, one and all!

Top 3: Nanay's Hot Chocolate

I read my friend Anto's blog today about her family not being able to join her and her husband in Singapore for Christmas. This was after months of preparation and anticipation, and I was deeply affected for her. Somehow, I felt the frustration, the pain, the longing...

Searching for the answer about why I've had the cloud of despair suddenly hanging over me upon reading her news, I realized that I've been in her shoes - about eleven Christmases ago - the very first time we didn't spend Christmas with my dad's big, boisterous family in the Philippines.

Here is a poem that I wrote in college for one of my Asian American studies classes:

(NANAY is my Lola, my Dad's mother, who still lives in the Philippines.)

Nanay’s Hot Chocolate

My first Christmas in the U.S.
Was cold and sad, I missed
Nanay’s special hot chocolate
She always served on Christmas Eve.

Was freezing in my uncle’s house
Up on the mountains in Pacifica
Tears streaming down my face
Longing for just one sip
Of Nanay’s warm, luscious drink.

I remember seeing you in the kitchen
Your wrinkled brown hands stirring
Untiringly, the sweet smell of cocoa
Wafting, traveling, enveloping the whole house.

You prepared it and served it with love
Its warmth embraced us all
And as we ate the Noche Buena feast,
We knew you loved us so.

Now miles and miles away from you, Nanay,
I can only imagine
The warmth, the richness, and the smell
I can only dream of being near
Your hot chocolate and your sweet love.

Audrey Rica L. Vidal, Spring 2001

It’s fascinating how something as simple as a cup of hot chocolate can be so powerful in triggering such a fond memory of Christmas. Everything that was great about Christmas and why I looked forward to it every year of my life since I was a child, was all wrapped around that warm cup of hot chocolate that everyone would get at Noche Buena at my grandparents’ house. And that year for the first time, it was gone...

So in a way, I knew what Anto might be going through, so I prayed for her... But she is always positive and hopeful through God's grace, so I know she'll get through this. And now I pray for everyone else who is away from their family this Christmas. That God may help them realize what we always hear: Jesus is the reason for the season.

It's so true... "When Jesus is all we have, we realize that Jesus is all we need."

Top 4: Misa de Gallo

(Christmas in the Philippines... Pre-Marriage... Pre-Babies... Just my parents, my siblings, our family-like neighborhood in Casimiro Village...)

Our own family tradition was: On the day before Misa de Gallo begins, we would decorate our house to formally welcome the Christmas season. If you didn't know, Christmas in the Philippines would be welcomed as early as September. So, our house would always be the last house to be decorated - my brother, my sister, and I would just be so eager to put up that Christmas tree and brighten up our terrace with Christmas lights.

The next day, our mom would wake us up at 4:00 in the morning to prepare for first of nine dawn masses. God bless my mom for coming up with a sure-fire way of waking up the kids at such an ungodly hour: presents under the Christmas tree!!! Everyday for nine days, we would get one present! So of course, by the fifth day, even when I felt like crashing back to sleep, I would find that strength to get up and check out if that fifth present would be there -- and it was there -- every... single... year!

Nothing beats seeing your best friends first thing in the morning. We just had a blast picking each other up, going to church together, and buying puto bumbong, bibingka, and puto't kutsinta after the mass. On days that we didn't have school, we would just hang out until it was time for lunch! (sigh) Those were the days when life's most difficult problem was passing the third quarterly exams at school!

One final incentive: Upon completion of the nine dawn masses, we get to make a wish to the Lord. Any wish... and it will be given unto you... Sometimes, I feel like everyday is the ninth day of Misa de Gallo for GOD has showered me with so many blessings: most of them I had wished for... some, I haven't even wished for yet, but God has already given me because He knows what my heart longs for... and still others come as blessings in disguise - unfortunate incidents that turn out to be all a part of God's divine plan, for me to become a stronger person.

I wish you peace and happiness this Chrsitmas season... and always..

GOD BLESS!

TOP 5: Christmas Caroling

(As reminisced in 2006)

One of the biggest "celebrations" in the Philippines is "All Souls' Day," commemorated every 1st of November. We usually waited until it was over before we sang Christmas carols to our neighbors. My brother, my sister, and I would join forces with our best friends in the neighborhood: We would make tambourines out of bottle caps and hangers, drums out of empty cans, and drumsticks out of spoons that we didn't use anymore. Of course, we had this giant jar that held all the money we earned from singing Christmas carols from one house to the next.

Every night, after we've all done our homework and after we've had dinner, we would meet at our usual spot: at the corner of Acacia and Tanguile Streets (Casimiro Village, Las Pinas City, Philippines), where the lamp post and street signs were. There we would plan out our everning round: which streets and houses to cover, who's going with whom to which house, and such. I remember how we used to shove each other, "You go first." "No you go first!" But once somebody starts singing our favorite opening song: "Sa may bahay, ang aming bati / Merry Christmas na malwalhati..." Ah, yeah... it's all down hill from there... At the end of the evening, we would all count the money from the jar and divide it amongst us. We all had a blast!

Unforgettable moments? You bet!

Once, we've been singing for like forever at this one house. And then they said, "Patawad," which basically means, "Sorry, we have nothing to give you; go away." So we started singing, "Tenkyu, tenkyu. Ang babarat ninyo. Tenkyu!" (Thank you. Thank you. What a cheap a**! Thank you!) Before we could run away, they threw a banana peel at us! We all just laughed hysterically all the way to the next house...

Another time, we started singing "The Twelve Days of Christmas" at this one house. We actually started from the first day... So by the time we got to the seventh day, the youngest child from the house came out and gave us money. But we were just so determined to finish the entire song. I mean, why stop at the seventh day, right? So we kept on singing, and the child came out again and said, "Here's more money. My mom said please stop singing." After that, we decided that it would be better for us to sing that song starting from the twelfth day...

Oh, memories... (sigh)

Christmas Memories

Here are MY TOP 5 CHILDHOOD MEMORIES OF CHRISTMAS (and why it is my favorite time of the year!):

#5... Christmas Caroling

#4… Misa de Gallo

#3… Nanay’s Hot Chocolate

#2... Noche Buena

and

#1... Christmas Day Family Rituals

O, Christmas Tree!

We're keeping up with our family tradition! :)

My journal entry last year:

November 24, 2006
1 Day After Thanksgiving...
30 Days till Christmas...

One thing that we're definitely thankful for this year: Having a place of our own! We know, we know... it's not our own house yet, but it's great to see everyone and everything having a space of his/her/its own: the kids have their own room, WE have our own room, even Edison's dj equipment has its own room!

Another great thing: Edison and I finally felt that we can start our own family traditions. Last night after coming home from Thanksgiving dinner at Tito Ding and Tita Leng's home in Brentwood, we decided that we are going to "deck our halls" on the Friday after Thanksgiving... every year! I woke up this morning as a child would wake up on Christmas morning. I was so excited to get to Target and buy that white Christmas tree that we've been eyeing on since the day it came out...

As Edison put the hooks on each individually hand-picked ornament... Edward and Alison cheerfully handed them to me... I carefully placed them on the tree... childhood memories of decorating our house in the Philippines came rushing back to me; it put a smile on my face...

My Christmas Playlist

Christmas is undoubtedly my favorite time of the year! I have childhood memories of Christmas time that will keep me warm until I am old and gray. And I am creating new memories now with my family, hoping that these lasting impressions of Christmas would keep my children warm and fuzzy until they are old and gray, too.

I keep my Christmas playlist on my iPod all year long. And even in the middle of April, I sometimes catch myself playing some Christmas songs just for fun. For about three years now, I've been keeping the playlist - editing and updating only when there is a new Christmas song that I feel has got to make it to the list:

• Let It Snow (Jessica Simpson)
• Last Christmas (Hilary Duff)
• Santa Baby (Eartha Kitt)
• All I Want for Christmas is You (Mariah Carey)
• My Grownup Christmas List (Kelly Clarkson)
• Christmas is My Favorite Time of the Year (Kenny Rogers)
• Merry Christmas, Darling (The Carpenters)
• Baby, It's Cold Outside (Jessica Simpson & Nick Lachey)
• Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays (*Nsync)
• It's Christmas All Over the World (Sheena Easton)
• Hark, the Herald Angels Sing (Christmas Carols Album)
• O, Holy Night (Josh Groban)
• Christmas in our Hearts (Jose Mari Chan)
• Another New Year's Eve (Barry Manilow)
• Kiss Me at Midnight (*Nsync)

A little bit of fun, a little bit of nostalgia... these songs. Oh, I can't believe Christmas is 35 days away! I DO still feel like that little girl waking up at dawn to see what Santa has left for me under the tree... and then slowly realizing that the best gift of all is what's right in the middle of it all - the Baby in a manger.